The Gifting Question We Are Not Asking Enough

Of course most people don’t start choosing a gift by looking for something that won’t or doesn’t do something. Here’s why we should.

Every holiday season, a tidal wave of gift-related queries rolls across the world of search bars. Typing “gifts that…” into Google, it can sometimes feel like you’re not actually looking for a gift at all, but a winning hand of scrabble. Or algorithm poetry.

That’s the fun of using search prediction: it gives you a sense of where everyone else has started – even if Google’s first dozen suggestions hardly nudge you towards finding the one present that you can’t wait to gift.

There’s so much that goes into finding the “right gift” for someone based on their personality; and then there’s the mounting expectation surrounding not just gifts, but also the pretty packaging and experience of opening presents.

Only, once the thrill of the occasion has passed, what happens to all that stuff?
Historically, it has become a whole lot of waste.

Turns out 47% of holiday gifts were returned in the U.S. last year, and get this – that’s alongside spending $3.2 billion on wrapping paper annually. Wild.

Don’t get me wrong, the holiday-hysteria of sales, deals and discounts is pure joy! Seeing that many BOGO signs could turn a monk into a shopaholic (love you always, Isla Fischer). But asking one simple question – besides “do I really need this?” obviously – can help break the halo of a spending spree and save you so much decluttering, and guilt, down the line:

What will this gift NOT do?

An ideal-ish answer would be:

• This gift will not end up in the darkest corners of the closet/garage (I’m in NYC, so we barely have half of the first one here), as soon as the holiday season’s wrapped.
  
  
• It will not become a rarely-used dust collector (unless you’re buying a Dyson).
  
  
• It is not so far outside the giftee’s comfort zone that they’d have to change their whole vibe to be able to use it.
  
  
• Does not have “batteries sold separately” energy i.e. getting the gift to a point of functionality shouldn’t take more effort than actually using it.
  
  
• Does not come with an obligation to use it, meaning it can be regifted/passed on if the receiver knows they won’t use it.

Fortunately, the tides of ultra-capitalist holiday shopping are turning!
And the mindfulness movement could not have come at a better time (I mean, earlier would’ve been great but still, at least it’s here). Thoughtful gifts and conscious consumerism are on the rise, and a quick look at Google search trends for “Functional Gifts” confirms this hopeful shift. Around the holiday season over the last decade, you can see a marked increase in the number of people looking for gifts that really do keep on giving!

There’s obviously a lot more to unpack (ha!) around non-holiday-specific gifts, seeing as this push for sustainable, local, or handmade gifts is still not mainstream yet. 

But the case remains: so many of our good intentions are walking the fine line between what a present can do right now, and what it, hopefully, won’t do - or become - in the future.

So, the next time you’re searching for thoughtful gifts for loved ones (or even moderately-liked ones lol), consider asking yourself — do I like what this gift is not?